Happy Halloween, everyone! :D
I was meaning to rent two horror movies to mark the occasion: The Devil Inside and The Woman in Black. But The Woman in Black wasn't available to rent, even though Xtra-vision did have it to buy. It just makes no sense! So I had to make do with The Devil Inside and Wrath of the Titans.
So, The Devil Inside. I actually only watched this because of how awful I'd heard it was. It scores 7% on Rotten Tomatoes and 4.0 on IMDb. I didn't even give it a second thought at first; I just figured it was some lame horror movie that I was probably never going to see. But to hear that it was that bad? I just had to see for myself!
So yeah, I knew going in that it was probably going to be bad. But what I saw… Oh, God!!!
The first half is aggravating, with atrocious acting and the worst abuse of the "found footage" gimmick I've ever seen. It's a perfect example of, "Dude, just put the camera away!"
The second half, though, is just dull and uninteresting – probably the only time that's actually preferable!
Simply put, this is the worst fucking horror movie I've seen since The Fourth Kind, not to mention the absolute worst movie I've seen so far this year!
I give it my only turkey rating of the year so far!
And as for Wrath of the Titans… Now, I'm really scraping the bottom of the shit barrel with this one! It's an unnecessary sequel to an unnecessary remake! The amount of… unnecessary-ness here is just overwhelming!
But, just like its predecessor, the stuff that's good is good, but the stuff that's bad (which is the majority) is just dull and unremarkable.
I think the characters of Agenor and Hephaestus really sum it up best. When they're first introduced, they're both played very comedically and I don't like them at all. But when they do serve a purpose in the plot, they're wonderful.
Some of the elements of Greek mythology they throw in really work, but some, like the Minotaur, are just really unnecessary.
In conclusion, while it's not as dull as its predecessor, on the whole it's really no better.
My rating: 40%.
Wednesday 31 October 2012
Wednesday 24 October 2012
First Impressions: "A Thousand Words" + "The Raid" (2012)
Time for this week's pair of rentals. :)
First, A Thousand Words, the new comedy with Eddie Murphy. It boasts a 0% rating on Rotten Tomatoes, so I had to check it out! I was thinking, "It can't be that bad, right?" But indeed it was! Oh, God do I hate this movie! This is right up there with This Means War as one of the worst movies of the year so far!
I didn't mind the first half-hour too much, but I certainly wasn't laughing at it. But once Eddie Murphy's character is forced to stop talking, everything goes downhill fast! Every scene that follows, where they constantly hammer that joke into the ground, is just excruciating to watch.
In fact, there's a scene just before the hour mark where, if I'd had any other mentality, that would have been the last straw: I seriously would have stopped the movie right there!
It's a movie that annoys the shit out of me, and I hate it all the more for trying to be emotional.
My rating: 15%.
And second, The Raid (AKA The Raid: Redemption). Now you're talking! In an age overflowing with brainless CG-fests, it's so refreshing to see an old-school martial arts action flick on the market.
Sometimes, just seeing men pitting their strength, speed and wits against each other is so much more exciting than an exaggerated "epic" spectacle. And it's most certainly done right here! I can't even watch this movie without uttering some kind of verbal reaction to each blow like, "Ooh!" "Aw-haww!"
The premise is a SWAT team infiltrating a mob boss's apartment complex, fighting for their lives when their target tells all the tenants to attack them. It's a fantastic setup, and it makes sense that the action is almost nonstop: these guys just can't catch a break!
In conclusion, if you're an action fan, then you can't skip this one! It's high-octane violence at its best.
My rating: 85%.
First, A Thousand Words, the new comedy with Eddie Murphy. It boasts a 0% rating on Rotten Tomatoes, so I had to check it out! I was thinking, "It can't be that bad, right?" But indeed it was! Oh, God do I hate this movie! This is right up there with This Means War as one of the worst movies of the year so far!
I didn't mind the first half-hour too much, but I certainly wasn't laughing at it. But once Eddie Murphy's character is forced to stop talking, everything goes downhill fast! Every scene that follows, where they constantly hammer that joke into the ground, is just excruciating to watch.
In fact, there's a scene just before the hour mark where, if I'd had any other mentality, that would have been the last straw: I seriously would have stopped the movie right there!
It's a movie that annoys the shit out of me, and I hate it all the more for trying to be emotional.
My rating: 15%.
And second, The Raid (AKA The Raid: Redemption). Now you're talking! In an age overflowing with brainless CG-fests, it's so refreshing to see an old-school martial arts action flick on the market.
Sometimes, just seeing men pitting their strength, speed and wits against each other is so much more exciting than an exaggerated "epic" spectacle. And it's most certainly done right here! I can't even watch this movie without uttering some kind of verbal reaction to each blow like, "Ooh!" "Aw-haww!"
The premise is a SWAT team infiltrating a mob boss's apartment complex, fighting for their lives when their target tells all the tenants to attack them. It's a fantastic setup, and it makes sense that the action is almost nonstop: these guys just can't catch a break!
In conclusion, if you're an action fan, then you can't skip this one! It's high-octane violence at its best.
My rating: 85%.
Tuesday 23 October 2012
My Madame Tussauds Visit
As I mentioned before, while I was in England, I went up to London with my friend John and his mother Debbie. While Debbie was off doing her own thing, John and I visited Madame Tussauds, which turned out to be the bulk of our London trip as a whole. We wanted to see Buckingham Palace as well, because we were also in London last year but didn’t get to it. But we ended up spending so much time at Madame Tussauds that we never got round to it this time either.
Actually, let me digress slightly to explain what happened last year. That time, we saw a couple of the key London sights, like Westminster and the British Museum, and we walked along the river and passed right underneath the London Eye. We happened upon what we assumed to be the avenue to Buckingham Palace at one point, but didn’t actually follow it; we were heading in the other direction, because we were looking for Trafalgar Square.
So anyway, Madame Tussauds. For those of you who are ignorant slobs (like me), it’s a wax museum – probably one of the most famous in the world, with branches in several other major cities. Now, obviously, I wouldn’t want to spoil everything for anyone thinking of visiting it themselves. Though I probably wouldn’t be able to do that anyway, because I gather the wax sculptures are on a rotation – possibly traded among the other international branches – so there’s no guarantee that you’ll see the exact same assortment each time you visit. I’m just here to recap the ones that I remember seeing.
Well, the first thing to mention is how long it took to get in! There was quite a queue outside the door, and when we finally got to the front, we saw a notice warning that the actual ticket desk was still an hour away!
The ticket desk was at the end of a long passageway dotted with a few wax sculptures and various other displays. For example, Tom Hanks was standing in one corner. There was one of those panoramas with a hole to put your face through (I’m sure those things have a name, but I’ve never heard it used): in this case, your head was on a pike, having been decapitated! There was a policeman at the foot of the stairs right before the ticket desk, whom we thought at first was supposed to be Nicholas Angel from Hot Fuzz. But I think he was really just supposed to be an anonymous London police constable. Especially since he was standing next to another London landmark: a phone box.
And when we got up the stairs, there was still a weaving series of rope barriers leading up to the ticket desk – you know the way. It’s like they went out of their way to make the queue stretch as long as possible!
I should also mention that they had an offer on, allowing you to save money by booking with Madame Tussauds and one or more of three other major London attractions: Sea Life, the London Dungeon and the London Eye. But John and I decided against it just because of sheer monetary value. It cost £30 apiece just to get into Madame Tussauds, so to get it with something else would have cost a total of £100 or so.
So the first chamber was Andy Warhol-related, with a sculpture of Warhol himself and two women that I guessed were his models or something. There was an opportunity to get a professional picture taken and done in the style of a Warhol portrait. Neither John nor I had any interest in doing that, though.
But next was the main exhibit. I think they were calling it the Red Carpet Party or something. I recognised most of the Hollywood celebrities on display, but obviously not all of them.
The ones we noticed first, standing in a line, were (in order): Morgan Freeman, Russell Brand – probably the only time you’ll see those two standing together; one that I guessed to be Julia Roberts – we weren’t close enough to see their tags; Leonardo DiCaprio, whose eyebrows were so thin that they made him look Chinese or something; Nicole Kidman, Johnny Depp, Orlando Bloom, Miley Cyrus, and a couple at the end that I didn’t recognise.
Across the room from that line, there was a stage framed by two alcoves. On the stage were Colin Firth, Kate Winslet and Helen Mirren. In one of the alcoves was Cheryl Cole, and in the other were Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie.
In one corner was another opportunity to get a professional photograph taken – with Robert Pattinson and Taylor Lautner. Yeah, John and I avoided that one like the plague!
Tom Cruise was there – significantly taller than I thought! He was on the other side of a pillar from someone I’ll get to in a moment. George Clooney was there too. But I only recognised him because of his hair colour and the suit he was wearing; the face itself looked nothing like George Clooney.
Now, that room contained both the most lifelike figures in the whole museum and the absolute worst. Many of the other faces in the museum were almost spot-on, but Helen Mirren and Morgan Freeman were probably the best of them all. But by far the absolute worst was Brad Pitt. It looked nothing like Brad Pitt! It looked more like someone you’d see in a 60s gangster movie or something!
But, to make up for that, that room also contained an overload of awesomeness: Patrick Stewart and Sean Connery in the same room! :D Patrick Stewart was on the other side of the aforementioned pillar from Tom Cruise, and Sean Connery was right at the end of the room, next to George Clooney.
So following the Red Carpet Party (or whatever it was called) was a long hallway divided into several sections. Not by walls or anything, but it was just a few areas with a common theme.
There was a sports section. I have no interest in sports whatsoever, so I hardly knew any of the faces there. But I recognised David Beckham, of course. And Usain Bolt. And I remember Tiger Woods and Pelé were on a stand together.
Then there were a few historical figures, and the Royal Family across from them. The historical figures included Henry VIII standing between Elizabeth I and Mary, Queen of Scots, and the only other one I remember is Princess Diana. And the Royal Family included the Queen herself and Prince Philip, obviously, and also Prince William and Kate Middleton. Separate from them were Edward VIII and Wallis, Duchess of Windsor. I don’t think I need to explain the appropriateness of their separation!
Next up, across from a kiosk offering wax hands cast (John actually got one done), there were several key figures in the fields of science and literature, plus one or two in art. First was Sir Isaac Newton, who was holding a small glass object that really bewildered me. But then I looked at his tag, and it said he was a prime innovator in optics, so I guessed it was prism or something. Then there was Albert Einstein; I was surprised to see how short he was! In front of both of them was, to my surprise, Stephen Hawking. Next came Isambard Kingdom Brunel, William Shakespeare and Oscar Wilde. (John was surprised to find that he was Irish!) There was someone whom John guessed was Charles Dickens; there was no tag at all for him. And next to him were Vincent van Gogh and… Pablo Picasso, I think.
Next came a pretty big pop music section. As we went in, immediately to our left were the Beatles (pretty early on, from the look of it), and immediately to our right was… ugh… Justin Bieber! Going clockwise from the Beatles, there was ABBA, Michael Jackson (the wall next to him was almost like a shrine to him), and a stage boasting several other figures, of whom I only remember a handful. The ones I do clearly remember are Rihanna, Amy Winehouse, Lady Gaga in the Telephone attire, Freddie Mercury, Leona Lewis and Beyoncé. (Beyoncé was pretty off!) There were three other figures in front of the stage: Christina Aguilera (I was amazed at how tiny she was!), Robbie Williams and Bob Marley – the latter of whom I didn’t see at first, not until we backtracked later on.
And the final section was all to do with politics. On one side of a stand were several people who we assumed to be civil rights leaders, since Gandhi and Nelson Mandela were among them, and on the other side were Winston Churchill and Adolf Hitler. There were four figures of present-day British parliament, including Boris Johnson and David Cameron himself, standing in front of a Downing Street set. Across from them was a line of leaders I don’t remember or care about. After all, if there’s one thing that interests me less than sports, it’s politics. And finally, there was one more professional photograph being taken: of you behind the desk at the White House with Barack Obama! John decided to get that picture taken, and he got it printed and took it home.
So that was the end of the waxworks galleries, but there were still a few more attractions in store.
I remember, at one point, there was a display explaining the life of Madame Tussaud herself, and across from that was a demonstration of all the steps of creating a wax sculpture. The face bust of Beyoncé at the end of that looked far better than the actual model on display!
Then there was the Chamber of Horrors, which, for me, was completely underwhelming. I’ve seen so many horror movies that I’m certainly desensitised to stuff that’s tame enough to be a public display like that. The place was done in the style of a dark insane asylum, and they had live actors as the inmates, who’d sometimes lunge at you. But they assured us before we went in that they wouldn’t actually touch us, and they requested that we not touch them either. But really, the only kind of scary part for me was occasionally having a bright light shone in your face, which dazzled you so that, for a moment, you couldn’t see where you were going.
At either end of the Chamber of Horrors were a few displays of some olden-day torture methods, including a wax sculpture of Vlad the Impaler.
Then there was a ride called The Spirit of London. The cars were in the style of London taxis, and it was basically a train ride through the history of London. Not much to say there except that my favourite part was the smell when it got to the Black Death: that was pretty effective.
And the final attraction of note was an interactive movie called Marvel Super Heroes 4D.
In the passage leading up to it were sculptures of the various Marvel superheroes, including Spider-Man in an upside-down room, Wolverine in a cage, Nick Fury (with the Samuel L Jackson likeness, of course), Captain America (again, the movie version) and Iron Man. The Incredible Hulk took up two floors, with his hand coming through the railing of the balcony on the upper level, so that you could pose in his fist if you wanted to.
Now, the last time I saw the word “4D” used in a title was for Spy Kids 4, so I was really hoping this movie wouldn’t use that stupid Aroma-Scope gimmick. But no, it’s an interactive movie more along the lines of Honey, I Shrunk the Audience at Disneyland. For example, when Spider-Man shoots his web, you’ll feel a cold blast of air behind you to match. Also, it’s a 360° movie, so you’re watching it on the domed ceiling above you. (Someone once told me they saw Transformers in a cinema like that. I can only imagine how annoying that would be!)
Anyway, the movie was pretty underwhelming too. One of my main gripes with 3D as a whole is that I never sit in the right spot for the glasses to focus right. I don’t know if other people have that problem, but it’s something I’ve run into every single time I see a 3D movie.
Also, the “interactive” effects weren’t in any way realistic. For example, when Wolverine drew his claws, I felt prods in the seat digging into my back. John said he hadn’t felt that, so I guess it was only in some seats. But still, how does it in any way simulate Wolverine’s claws?
And the film itself was just plain silly. The dialogue was overly goofy and melodramatic. Maybe it was trying to appeal to kids or something. And it did get pretty laughable at times. Like why would the Marvel superheroes’ secret base be in Madame Tussauds?! :D And, as John pointed out, why was there only one guard at Buckingham Palace?
It did get me thinking, though. I want to see the villain Doctor Doom in one of the upcoming Marvel movies! :)
So there you have it. That was my personal Madame Tussauds experience. Like I said, maybe you’ll have an entirely different one. In any case, I thoroughly enjoyed myself. John and I had to pay a total of £60 to get in, and I’d say we definitely got our money’s worth! :)
Actually, let me digress slightly to explain what happened last year. That time, we saw a couple of the key London sights, like Westminster and the British Museum, and we walked along the river and passed right underneath the London Eye. We happened upon what we assumed to be the avenue to Buckingham Palace at one point, but didn’t actually follow it; we were heading in the other direction, because we were looking for Trafalgar Square.
So anyway, Madame Tussauds. For those of you who are ignorant slobs (like me), it’s a wax museum – probably one of the most famous in the world, with branches in several other major cities. Now, obviously, I wouldn’t want to spoil everything for anyone thinking of visiting it themselves. Though I probably wouldn’t be able to do that anyway, because I gather the wax sculptures are on a rotation – possibly traded among the other international branches – so there’s no guarantee that you’ll see the exact same assortment each time you visit. I’m just here to recap the ones that I remember seeing.
Well, the first thing to mention is how long it took to get in! There was quite a queue outside the door, and when we finally got to the front, we saw a notice warning that the actual ticket desk was still an hour away!
The ticket desk was at the end of a long passageway dotted with a few wax sculptures and various other displays. For example, Tom Hanks was standing in one corner. There was one of those panoramas with a hole to put your face through (I’m sure those things have a name, but I’ve never heard it used): in this case, your head was on a pike, having been decapitated! There was a policeman at the foot of the stairs right before the ticket desk, whom we thought at first was supposed to be Nicholas Angel from Hot Fuzz. But I think he was really just supposed to be an anonymous London police constable. Especially since he was standing next to another London landmark: a phone box.
And when we got up the stairs, there was still a weaving series of rope barriers leading up to the ticket desk – you know the way. It’s like they went out of their way to make the queue stretch as long as possible!
I should also mention that they had an offer on, allowing you to save money by booking with Madame Tussauds and one or more of three other major London attractions: Sea Life, the London Dungeon and the London Eye. But John and I decided against it just because of sheer monetary value. It cost £30 apiece just to get into Madame Tussauds, so to get it with something else would have cost a total of £100 or so.
So the first chamber was Andy Warhol-related, with a sculpture of Warhol himself and two women that I guessed were his models or something. There was an opportunity to get a professional picture taken and done in the style of a Warhol portrait. Neither John nor I had any interest in doing that, though.
But next was the main exhibit. I think they were calling it the Red Carpet Party or something. I recognised most of the Hollywood celebrities on display, but obviously not all of them.
The ones we noticed first, standing in a line, were (in order): Morgan Freeman, Russell Brand – probably the only time you’ll see those two standing together; one that I guessed to be Julia Roberts – we weren’t close enough to see their tags; Leonardo DiCaprio, whose eyebrows were so thin that they made him look Chinese or something; Nicole Kidman, Johnny Depp, Orlando Bloom, Miley Cyrus, and a couple at the end that I didn’t recognise.
Across the room from that line, there was a stage framed by two alcoves. On the stage were Colin Firth, Kate Winslet and Helen Mirren. In one of the alcoves was Cheryl Cole, and in the other were Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie.
In one corner was another opportunity to get a professional photograph taken – with Robert Pattinson and Taylor Lautner. Yeah, John and I avoided that one like the plague!
Tom Cruise was there – significantly taller than I thought! He was on the other side of a pillar from someone I’ll get to in a moment. George Clooney was there too. But I only recognised him because of his hair colour and the suit he was wearing; the face itself looked nothing like George Clooney.
Now, that room contained both the most lifelike figures in the whole museum and the absolute worst. Many of the other faces in the museum were almost spot-on, but Helen Mirren and Morgan Freeman were probably the best of them all. But by far the absolute worst was Brad Pitt. It looked nothing like Brad Pitt! It looked more like someone you’d see in a 60s gangster movie or something!
But, to make up for that, that room also contained an overload of awesomeness: Patrick Stewart and Sean Connery in the same room! :D Patrick Stewart was on the other side of the aforementioned pillar from Tom Cruise, and Sean Connery was right at the end of the room, next to George Clooney.
So following the Red Carpet Party (or whatever it was called) was a long hallway divided into several sections. Not by walls or anything, but it was just a few areas with a common theme.
There was a sports section. I have no interest in sports whatsoever, so I hardly knew any of the faces there. But I recognised David Beckham, of course. And Usain Bolt. And I remember Tiger Woods and Pelé were on a stand together.
Then there were a few historical figures, and the Royal Family across from them. The historical figures included Henry VIII standing between Elizabeth I and Mary, Queen of Scots, and the only other one I remember is Princess Diana. And the Royal Family included the Queen herself and Prince Philip, obviously, and also Prince William and Kate Middleton. Separate from them were Edward VIII and Wallis, Duchess of Windsor. I don’t think I need to explain the appropriateness of their separation!
Next up, across from a kiosk offering wax hands cast (John actually got one done), there were several key figures in the fields of science and literature, plus one or two in art. First was Sir Isaac Newton, who was holding a small glass object that really bewildered me. But then I looked at his tag, and it said he was a prime innovator in optics, so I guessed it was prism or something. Then there was Albert Einstein; I was surprised to see how short he was! In front of both of them was, to my surprise, Stephen Hawking. Next came Isambard Kingdom Brunel, William Shakespeare and Oscar Wilde. (John was surprised to find that he was Irish!) There was someone whom John guessed was Charles Dickens; there was no tag at all for him. And next to him were Vincent van Gogh and… Pablo Picasso, I think.
Next came a pretty big pop music section. As we went in, immediately to our left were the Beatles (pretty early on, from the look of it), and immediately to our right was… ugh… Justin Bieber! Going clockwise from the Beatles, there was ABBA, Michael Jackson (the wall next to him was almost like a shrine to him), and a stage boasting several other figures, of whom I only remember a handful. The ones I do clearly remember are Rihanna, Amy Winehouse, Lady Gaga in the Telephone attire, Freddie Mercury, Leona Lewis and Beyoncé. (Beyoncé was pretty off!) There were three other figures in front of the stage: Christina Aguilera (I was amazed at how tiny she was!), Robbie Williams and Bob Marley – the latter of whom I didn’t see at first, not until we backtracked later on.
And the final section was all to do with politics. On one side of a stand were several people who we assumed to be civil rights leaders, since Gandhi and Nelson Mandela were among them, and on the other side were Winston Churchill and Adolf Hitler. There were four figures of present-day British parliament, including Boris Johnson and David Cameron himself, standing in front of a Downing Street set. Across from them was a line of leaders I don’t remember or care about. After all, if there’s one thing that interests me less than sports, it’s politics. And finally, there was one more professional photograph being taken: of you behind the desk at the White House with Barack Obama! John decided to get that picture taken, and he got it printed and took it home.
So that was the end of the waxworks galleries, but there were still a few more attractions in store.
I remember, at one point, there was a display explaining the life of Madame Tussaud herself, and across from that was a demonstration of all the steps of creating a wax sculpture. The face bust of Beyoncé at the end of that looked far better than the actual model on display!
Then there was the Chamber of Horrors, which, for me, was completely underwhelming. I’ve seen so many horror movies that I’m certainly desensitised to stuff that’s tame enough to be a public display like that. The place was done in the style of a dark insane asylum, and they had live actors as the inmates, who’d sometimes lunge at you. But they assured us before we went in that they wouldn’t actually touch us, and they requested that we not touch them either. But really, the only kind of scary part for me was occasionally having a bright light shone in your face, which dazzled you so that, for a moment, you couldn’t see where you were going.
At either end of the Chamber of Horrors were a few displays of some olden-day torture methods, including a wax sculpture of Vlad the Impaler.
Then there was a ride called The Spirit of London. The cars were in the style of London taxis, and it was basically a train ride through the history of London. Not much to say there except that my favourite part was the smell when it got to the Black Death: that was pretty effective.
And the final attraction of note was an interactive movie called Marvel Super Heroes 4D.
In the passage leading up to it were sculptures of the various Marvel superheroes, including Spider-Man in an upside-down room, Wolverine in a cage, Nick Fury (with the Samuel L Jackson likeness, of course), Captain America (again, the movie version) and Iron Man. The Incredible Hulk took up two floors, with his hand coming through the railing of the balcony on the upper level, so that you could pose in his fist if you wanted to.
Now, the last time I saw the word “4D” used in a title was for Spy Kids 4, so I was really hoping this movie wouldn’t use that stupid Aroma-Scope gimmick. But no, it’s an interactive movie more along the lines of Honey, I Shrunk the Audience at Disneyland. For example, when Spider-Man shoots his web, you’ll feel a cold blast of air behind you to match. Also, it’s a 360° movie, so you’re watching it on the domed ceiling above you. (Someone once told me they saw Transformers in a cinema like that. I can only imagine how annoying that would be!)
Anyway, the movie was pretty underwhelming too. One of my main gripes with 3D as a whole is that I never sit in the right spot for the glasses to focus right. I don’t know if other people have that problem, but it’s something I’ve run into every single time I see a 3D movie.
Also, the “interactive” effects weren’t in any way realistic. For example, when Wolverine drew his claws, I felt prods in the seat digging into my back. John said he hadn’t felt that, so I guess it was only in some seats. But still, how does it in any way simulate Wolverine’s claws?
And the film itself was just plain silly. The dialogue was overly goofy and melodramatic. Maybe it was trying to appeal to kids or something. And it did get pretty laughable at times. Like why would the Marvel superheroes’ secret base be in Madame Tussauds?! :D And, as John pointed out, why was there only one guard at Buckingham Palace?
It did get me thinking, though. I want to see the villain Doctor Doom in one of the upcoming Marvel movies! :)
So there you have it. That was my personal Madame Tussauds experience. Like I said, maybe you’ll have an entirely different one. In any case, I thoroughly enjoyed myself. John and I had to pay a total of £60 to get in, and I’d say we definitely got our money’s worth! :)
Monday 22 October 2012
First Impressions: "Stacking" + "Eufloria"
And finally, I'll just briefly comment on two little independent games.
Stacking is an adventure game from Double Fine in which you play a little Russian nested doll trying to rescue his family.
You can stack up with larger dolls and take control of them, and this leads to some fun puzzles.
It's another game I look forward to playing more.
My rating: 70%.
And Eufloria is a very simplistic game where you're basically planting seeds on asteroids. Later on, you have to use those seeds to fight evil ones, but I was just too unenthused to think in the required strategic way. The whole concept didn't do a thing for me at all. It's a game about planting seeds! It just left me thinking, "Why am I playing this?"
It's better to think of them as spaceships or something, and I had a lot more fun watching John play it – 'cos he got much more into it.
I don't have a rating for this one, since it's perfectly fine for what it is, but it just didn't appeal to me personally.
So that's the end of my first impressions of everything I saw (or played) in England. Stay tuned for the account of my trip to Madame Tussauds, coming soon.
Stacking is an adventure game from Double Fine in which you play a little Russian nested doll trying to rescue his family.
You can stack up with larger dolls and take control of them, and this leads to some fun puzzles.
It's another game I look forward to playing more.
My rating: 70%.
And Eufloria is a very simplistic game where you're basically planting seeds on asteroids. Later on, you have to use those seeds to fight evil ones, but I was just too unenthused to think in the required strategic way. The whole concept didn't do a thing for me at all. It's a game about planting seeds! It just left me thinking, "Why am I playing this?"
It's better to think of them as spaceships or something, and I had a lot more fun watching John play it – 'cos he got much more into it.
I don't have a rating for this one, since it's perfectly fine for what it is, but it just didn't appeal to me personally.
So that's the end of my first impressions of everything I saw (or played) in England. Stay tuned for the account of my trip to Madame Tussauds, coming soon.
First Impressions: "The Walking Dead" + "XCOM: Enemy Unknown"
As I mentioned, I also played a couple of games in England. So here we go: my first video game-related first impression comments! :)
The big one was The Walking Dead from Telltale. I watched the first season of the show while I was there, and I was distinctly underwhelmed. I know they're both based on the comic book series, so there's not much point in comparing the two, but in my opinion the Telltale game blows the show out of the water. It's a much more believable depiction of the zombie apocalypse, and I like the characters far, far, far better.
It's also really clever how the game actually adapts to the choices you make along the way. It really does seem like you're creating your own adventure.
So far, only episodes one to four have been released, and I really look forward to seeing the fifth and final – though I will admit the voice on the phone seems to have taken a step into straight-up Bond villain territory.
Overall, another of Telltale's triumphs.
My rating: 95%.
I also played another game that's been causing quite a buzz recently: XCOM: Enemy Unknown. From what I can gather, this is the game that hardcore X-COM fans had been waiting for, finally returning the series to its turn-based strategy roots. For me, it was my first X-COM experience, and it was a highly enjoyable one.
Though I admit I'm not the best strategic thinker in the world. John and I took it in turns to play the game, which I think further impeded my performance: I lost out on valuable experience, so when it came to the tougher situations later on, I just got clobbered – especially going up against the Chrysalids. (God, I fucking hate those things!)
I really need to get it myself and get some practice of my own. So it's a good thing it's a good enough game that I really want to do that anyway! :)
I can see it having a lot of replay value and giving me hours of fun in the future.
My rating: 90%.
The big one was The Walking Dead from Telltale. I watched the first season of the show while I was there, and I was distinctly underwhelmed. I know they're both based on the comic book series, so there's not much point in comparing the two, but in my opinion the Telltale game blows the show out of the water. It's a much more believable depiction of the zombie apocalypse, and I like the characters far, far, far better.
It's also really clever how the game actually adapts to the choices you make along the way. It really does seem like you're creating your own adventure.
So far, only episodes one to four have been released, and I really look forward to seeing the fifth and final – though I will admit the voice on the phone seems to have taken a step into straight-up Bond villain territory.
Overall, another of Telltale's triumphs.
My rating: 95%.
I also played another game that's been causing quite a buzz recently: XCOM: Enemy Unknown. From what I can gather, this is the game that hardcore X-COM fans had been waiting for, finally returning the series to its turn-based strategy roots. For me, it was my first X-COM experience, and it was a highly enjoyable one.
Though I admit I'm not the best strategic thinker in the world. John and I took it in turns to play the game, which I think further impeded my performance: I lost out on valuable experience, so when it came to the tougher situations later on, I just got clobbered – especially going up against the Chrysalids. (God, I fucking hate those things!)
I really need to get it myself and get some practice of my own. So it's a good thing it's a good enough game that I really want to do that anyway! :)
I can see it having a lot of replay value and giving me hours of fun in the future.
My rating: 90%.
First Impressions: "30 Days of Night" (2007), "City of God" (2002) + "Predators" (2010)
John and I also watched a couple of DVDs I'd brought with me.
The first was 30 Days of Night. One word: sucked! I haven't read the comic it's based on, but it can't be any worse than this! After all, this is an awesome premise. But man is it executed poorly in this movie!
All the performances are dull as dishwater, which makes the sombre tone seem downright boring rather than desperate. (So you can see why they chose David Slade to direct a Twilight movie!)
We get no sense whatsoever of the passing of time. Instead of just jumping ahead a few days every once in a while, how about if the vampires had massacred the town gradually, building up to a climax?
And the vampires themselves just look… well… silly.
So yeah, I don't like this one. A great premise and cinematography can't make up for an insufferably boring tone.
My rating: 35%.
And the second was City of God. Now, that's more like it!
A caption on the box calls it the Brazilian Goodfellas, and coincidentally that's exactly what I was thinking while watching it! It reminds me very much of Goodfellas with its narration and its premise of the everymen working their way up the mob hierarchy.
This is a gang war story in which both sides are as rotten as each other, so who you root for depends on whose ideals you agree with most. Rocket is the only one who stays honest throughout, but all the characters are easy to latch onto because of how human they seem (except for Li'l Zé, whose thirst for violence seems to come completely out of nowhere).
At times it gets pretty unpleasant, but it never stops being an entertaining and captivating story. Terrific movie.
My rating: 90%.
And finally, we watched one of John's DVDs: Predators. This is another one that I really enjoyed. Everyone says it's a long-awaited worthy sequel to the franchise, and they're not kidding. It captures everything that was good about the original Predator, but still updates it appropriately.
My favourite scene is actually the opening. It's a fantastic excuse to have the characters fight right off the bat!
I actually think it's much more consistently strong than the original, where the first half wasn't that interesting, but it accelerated to one of the best climaxes I've ever seen. Though, on that note, I wish this movie could have had a better climax. The ending does lead to a really weak twist.
Still, all the performances are solid (especially Adrien Brody), and the movie never stops being entertaining and awesome.
My rating: 75%.
The first was 30 Days of Night. One word: sucked! I haven't read the comic it's based on, but it can't be any worse than this! After all, this is an awesome premise. But man is it executed poorly in this movie!
All the performances are dull as dishwater, which makes the sombre tone seem downright boring rather than desperate. (So you can see why they chose David Slade to direct a Twilight movie!)
We get no sense whatsoever of the passing of time. Instead of just jumping ahead a few days every once in a while, how about if the vampires had massacred the town gradually, building up to a climax?
And the vampires themselves just look… well… silly.
So yeah, I don't like this one. A great premise and cinematography can't make up for an insufferably boring tone.
My rating: 35%.
And the second was City of God. Now, that's more like it!
A caption on the box calls it the Brazilian Goodfellas, and coincidentally that's exactly what I was thinking while watching it! It reminds me very much of Goodfellas with its narration and its premise of the everymen working their way up the mob hierarchy.
This is a gang war story in which both sides are as rotten as each other, so who you root for depends on whose ideals you agree with most. Rocket is the only one who stays honest throughout, but all the characters are easy to latch onto because of how human they seem (except for Li'l Zé, whose thirst for violence seems to come completely out of nowhere).
At times it gets pretty unpleasant, but it never stops being an entertaining and captivating story. Terrific movie.
My rating: 90%.
And finally, we watched one of John's DVDs: Predators. This is another one that I really enjoyed. Everyone says it's a long-awaited worthy sequel to the franchise, and they're not kidding. It captures everything that was good about the original Predator, but still updates it appropriately.
My favourite scene is actually the opening. It's a fantastic excuse to have the characters fight right off the bat!
I actually think it's much more consistently strong than the original, where the first half wasn't that interesting, but it accelerated to one of the best climaxes I've ever seen. Though, on that note, I wish this movie could have had a better climax. The ending does lead to a really weak twist.
Still, all the performances are solid (especially Adrien Brody), and the movie never stops being entertaining and awesome.
My rating: 75%.
First Impressions: "Frankenweenie" + "Taken 2" (2012)
John and I went to the cinema again on Thursday.
The first movie we saw was Frankenweenie. It's Tim Burton once again doing what he does best: a dark, somewhat twisted horror spoof. Stop-motion animation, too. It's classic Tim Burton inside and out. But it's a shame the movie itself is just okay.
It has a lot of cute references to classic horror movies (my personal favourite being a dog with the Bride of Frankenstein hair), the climax has some fun moments, and of course it's all flawlessly animated. But none of it packs any kind of emotional punch, even though it's trying to. Maybe it's the voice acting – I don't know.
Other than that, I'm not sure what to say about this one. I liked parts of it, and it had a lot of potential, but overall it was nowhere near as strong as it could have been. I prefer this year's other stop-motion horror spoof, ParaNorman, by far.
My rating: 60%.
And the second was Taken 2. This one's okay too. It's certainly much simpler than the original. It's not trying to be anything more than a simple revenge-themed action fest. And for that, it's not bad.
In a way, it's also less pretentious than the original. I've mentioned before that you'd expect a certain degree of maturity from a film involving the very real issue of human trafficking. But this sequel has nothing to do with that.
The only major problem is the excessive Bourne-esque shaky cam. I thought at first that that would constantly irritate me, but luckily, for the most part, I could still make out what was happening.
Also, the story has no real structure, so the climax kind of caught me off guard when it arrived.
On the whole, I think it's okay. It's a fun film with some fun moments.
My rating: 60%.
The first movie we saw was Frankenweenie. It's Tim Burton once again doing what he does best: a dark, somewhat twisted horror spoof. Stop-motion animation, too. It's classic Tim Burton inside and out. But it's a shame the movie itself is just okay.
It has a lot of cute references to classic horror movies (my personal favourite being a dog with the Bride of Frankenstein hair), the climax has some fun moments, and of course it's all flawlessly animated. But none of it packs any kind of emotional punch, even though it's trying to. Maybe it's the voice acting – I don't know.
Other than that, I'm not sure what to say about this one. I liked parts of it, and it had a lot of potential, but overall it was nowhere near as strong as it could have been. I prefer this year's other stop-motion horror spoof, ParaNorman, by far.
My rating: 60%.
And the second was Taken 2. This one's okay too. It's certainly much simpler than the original. It's not trying to be anything more than a simple revenge-themed action fest. And for that, it's not bad.
In a way, it's also less pretentious than the original. I've mentioned before that you'd expect a certain degree of maturity from a film involving the very real issue of human trafficking. But this sequel has nothing to do with that.
The only major problem is the excessive Bourne-esque shaky cam. I thought at first that that would constantly irritate me, but luckily, for the most part, I could still make out what was happening.
Also, the story has no real structure, so the climax kind of caught me off guard when it arrived.
On the whole, I think it's okay. It's a fun film with some fun moments.
My rating: 60%.
First Impressions: "The Perks of Being a Wallflower" + "Looper" (2012)
All right, I'm back! :D I just got home from a week-long trip to England. And I have quite a few first impressions for you – as well as an account of my visit to Madame Tussauds in London! :) I'll probably post that story in full later on. But first, obviously, I'll go through my first impression reviews in small doses. I have seven movies to get through, plus a couple of video games.
First up, my friend John and I went to the cinema on Tuesday and saw two movies.
The first was The Perks of Being a Wallflower, which, for me, was this year's biggest surprise since The Cabin in the Woods! It's about a junior in high school who's an outcast until he's taken under the wing of two seniors. Maybe it's just because I'm overly sentimental and a sucker for underdog stories, but I surprisingly really loved this movie.
In many ways, this is the polar opposite of Project X, since I genuinely liked all these characters and wanted to be part of this high school.
It may seem overly soap opera-ish to some people, but I'll admit that I loved every second of it. It's a very familiar story, but its characters are so charming that it's just irresistible.
My rating: 85%.
And the second was Looper. And my first impression is that it was a tad over-hyped. I mean, yes, it was undeniably clever and very entertaining, but it didn't blow my mind, and I didn't think it was as amazing as everybody said.
Parts of it maybe weren't quite developed enough for me to immediately get them, so my lingering confusion is probably why some later scenes fell flat.
But like I said, this is just my initial reaction. Maybe a second viewing will change my mind.
Still, many individual scenes were brilliantly written and executed, even if it didn't quite all gel together for me. What happens to the old Seth still sticks in my head; that was brutal!
So on the whole, I enjoyed it, and I look forward to seeing it again to see if I can follow everything that evaded me the first time round.
My rating: 75%.
Thursday 11 October 2012
First Impressions: "The Dictator" + "How I Spent My Summer Vacation" (2012)
Time for this week's pair of rentals. :)
Number one: The Dictator. Now, I was a tad sceptical about this one because of the Sacha Baron Cohen formula. I fucking *hate* Borat, and I haven't seen Brüno but I have reason to believe it's even worse. But The Dictator… I'm surprised! This one was actually kind of funny! True, it has several moments that are just downright uncomfortable – and not in a funny way like I'm sure they were intended – but a lot of the rest did make me laugh. Maybe it's because it has a definitive story as opposed to just being a series of awkward encounters. Or maybe it's because the main character being an authority figure gives it more of an edge. In any case, it does have its moments, though maybe not quite enough of them. But it was a hell of a lot better than Borat.
My rating: 55%.
And number two: How I Spent My Summer Vacation (known in the US as Get the Gringo). We all know that Mel Gibson's not the most popular guy in the world right now, but he still has plenty of charm on screen. I just love his character's first few minutes of screen time. It's just a shame the rest of the movie doesn't quite live up to that.
The premise is basically an American citizen trying to survive in a Mexican prison. That alone could have filled an entire movie. But instead, the plot gets so needlessly complicated with a web of conspiracy involving the money our hero stole. By the end, I neither knew nor cared what was going on.
So, like The Dictator, my rating for this one would be, to quote Roger Ebert, a close call but a marginal thumbs-down.
My rating: 55%.
Number one: The Dictator. Now, I was a tad sceptical about this one because of the Sacha Baron Cohen formula. I fucking *hate* Borat, and I haven't seen Brüno but I have reason to believe it's even worse. But The Dictator… I'm surprised! This one was actually kind of funny! True, it has several moments that are just downright uncomfortable – and not in a funny way like I'm sure they were intended – but a lot of the rest did make me laugh. Maybe it's because it has a definitive story as opposed to just being a series of awkward encounters. Or maybe it's because the main character being an authority figure gives it more of an edge. In any case, it does have its moments, though maybe not quite enough of them. But it was a hell of a lot better than Borat.
My rating: 55%.
And number two: How I Spent My Summer Vacation (known in the US as Get the Gringo). We all know that Mel Gibson's not the most popular guy in the world right now, but he still has plenty of charm on screen. I just love his character's first few minutes of screen time. It's just a shame the rest of the movie doesn't quite live up to that.
The premise is basically an American citizen trying to survive in a Mexican prison. That alone could have filled an entire movie. But instead, the plot gets so needlessly complicated with a web of conspiracy involving the money our hero stole. By the end, I neither knew nor cared what was going on.
So, like The Dictator, my rating for this one would be, to quote Roger Ebert, a close call but a marginal thumbs-down.
My rating: 55%.
Thursday 4 October 2012
First Impressions: "The Cold Light of Day" + "The Cabin in the Woods" (2012)
Two more rentals this week.
Number one: The Cold Light of Day. And man is this a lame one! I haven't come across an action thriller so bland and uninteresting in quite a while now.
Most of the movie is pretty much just one chase sequence after another, and whenever it does stop to explain the story, it's so clichéd and confusing that it's impossible to care about, which means the action falls completely flat.
Not to mention, the action itself looks really amateurish at times. The fight following the first chase scene doesn't pack any punch whatsoever.
Plus Sigourney Weaver looks like she really doesn't want to be there.
Other than that, there's not really much to say about this one. It's just uninspired and unremarkable.
My rating: 30%.
And number two: The Cabin in the Woods. Of course I was sure I was going to like this one, but wow did I underestimate it! This has to be one of the best horror movies of maybe the past decade.
It's a pitch-perfect satire of slasher movie clichés and traditions, because it comes up with a story that actually accommodates them.
And all the characters are genuinely likable; none of them are idiots. In fact, one of my favourite scenes is when one of them demonstrates that he's not even a creep.
Now, unfortunately, to talk about it too much would mean spoiling a good chunk of the story. But I will say, if you like horror movies at all, then you can't skip this one. I think it's simply fantastic. Hands down, one of the best movies of the year so far – top five easily.
My rating: 85%.
Number one: The Cold Light of Day. And man is this a lame one! I haven't come across an action thriller so bland and uninteresting in quite a while now.
Most of the movie is pretty much just one chase sequence after another, and whenever it does stop to explain the story, it's so clichéd and confusing that it's impossible to care about, which means the action falls completely flat.
Not to mention, the action itself looks really amateurish at times. The fight following the first chase scene doesn't pack any punch whatsoever.
Plus Sigourney Weaver looks like she really doesn't want to be there.
Other than that, there's not really much to say about this one. It's just uninspired and unremarkable.
My rating: 30%.
And number two: The Cabin in the Woods. Of course I was sure I was going to like this one, but wow did I underestimate it! This has to be one of the best horror movies of maybe the past decade.
It's a pitch-perfect satire of slasher movie clichés and traditions, because it comes up with a story that actually accommodates them.
And all the characters are genuinely likable; none of them are idiots. In fact, one of my favourite scenes is when one of them demonstrates that he's not even a creep.
Now, unfortunately, to talk about it too much would mean spoiling a good chunk of the story. But I will say, if you like horror movies at all, then you can't skip this one. I think it's simply fantastic. Hands down, one of the best movies of the year so far – top five easily.
My rating: 85%.
Wednesday 3 October 2012
First Impressions: "Star Trek: Voyager"
Well, I've finished the Disney marathon. But before I start on the next load of movies I intend to watch, I've rented two more films – as I do just about every week – so I'll be watching and commenting on them tomorrow.
In the meantime, let me offer my first impressions on a TV show for once. :)
I am proud to say that I'm a Star Trek fan; it's my favourite show of all time. Though I have to admit I only got into it quite recently. So far, I've only seen the Original Series once through, plus the six movies associated with it (seven if you count the 2009 one), along with a few episodes of The Next Generation. But the overall concept of the show is right up my street.
There was an episode of Star Trek: Voyager on CBS Action tonight. I saw the first few minutes of it, and given the premise of the episode, I thought it best to avoid it for the sake of spoilers.
I did get my first taste of Voyager last week, though. The episode I saw presented one particular character with a seemingly inescapable problem, and in true Star Trek fashion, it did a fantastic job of holding my interest; I wanted to know what was happening and how the characters would overcome the obstacles.
So, based on that episode, I really look forward to seeing the rest of the series.
Also, I have to say, I love the Voyager theme music! It's just beautiful. It actually reminds me of the Sky Chase Zone theme from Sonic the Hedgehog 2.
In the meantime, let me offer my first impressions on a TV show for once. :)
I am proud to say that I'm a Star Trek fan; it's my favourite show of all time. Though I have to admit I only got into it quite recently. So far, I've only seen the Original Series once through, plus the six movies associated with it (seven if you count the 2009 one), along with a few episodes of The Next Generation. But the overall concept of the show is right up my street.
There was an episode of Star Trek: Voyager on CBS Action tonight. I saw the first few minutes of it, and given the premise of the episode, I thought it best to avoid it for the sake of spoilers.
I did get my first taste of Voyager last week, though. The episode I saw presented one particular character with a seemingly inescapable problem, and in true Star Trek fashion, it did a fantastic job of holding my interest; I wanted to know what was happening and how the characters would overcome the obstacles.
So, based on that episode, I really look forward to seeing the rest of the series.
Also, I have to say, I love the Voyager theme music! It's just beautiful. It actually reminds me of the Sky Chase Zone theme from Sonic the Hedgehog 2.
Tuesday 2 October 2012
Looking Forward to "Wreck-It Ralph"
Well, I'm just a hair away from the end of my Disney marathon now. There's only one movie left to watch: Winnie the Pooh.
I guess it was a near-perfect time for me to have this marathon, because Disney's fifty-second animated feature, Wreck-It Ralph, is coming out on November 2nd. In the US, at least. So if you want to hear my thoughts on it, you'll be waiting quite a while, since it doesn't come out here until February.
That unfortunately means I won't be able to include it on my best movies list at the end of the year – because I'm sure it would be a contender. The story sounds cool – like Monsters, Inc. with video game characters, in a sense – but what really sold me was one particular scene in the trailer. It's so surreal to see characters like Bowser, Zangief, M Bison, Dr Robotnik and a ghost from Pac-Man in the same room together! That image alone is worth the price of admission! :D
One more thing. Once the Disney marathon is over, coming next is a whole bunch of movies I've downloaded – mostly ones that I want to watch so I can complete the Movie Compatibility Test on Flixster. Rather pointless, I know, but I might as well.
And in between those movies, I think I'll have another run through the James Bond series to prepare for the release of Skyfall.
I guess it was a near-perfect time for me to have this marathon, because Disney's fifty-second animated feature, Wreck-It Ralph, is coming out on November 2nd. In the US, at least. So if you want to hear my thoughts on it, you'll be waiting quite a while, since it doesn't come out here until February.
That unfortunately means I won't be able to include it on my best movies list at the end of the year – because I'm sure it would be a contender. The story sounds cool – like Monsters, Inc. with video game characters, in a sense – but what really sold me was one particular scene in the trailer. It's so surreal to see characters like Bowser, Zangief, M Bison, Dr Robotnik and a ghost from Pac-Man in the same room together! That image alone is worth the price of admission! :D
One more thing. Once the Disney marathon is over, coming next is a whole bunch of movies I've downloaded – mostly ones that I want to watch so I can complete the Movie Compatibility Test on Flixster. Rather pointless, I know, but I might as well.
And in between those movies, I think I'll have another run through the James Bond series to prepare for the release of Skyfall.
First Impressions: "Bolt" (2008)
All right, this'll be my last "first impressions" comment from the Disney marathon, because… well, this is the last one that's new to me. There are only three to go after this – The Princess and the Frog, Tangled and Winnie the Pooh – and I've seen them all before.
Anyway, here are my comments on Bolt.
Well, this one defied my expectations twice in the first half-hour! It begins with an excessive action sequence, making you think the dog's a secret agent. But then it turns out it was just a movie being shot, but the dog thinks it's all real. That's a brilliant idea! But it becomes an ongoing gimmick that lasts for the first half of the movie, and it does get kind of annoying.
The movie does have a number of good jokes and impressive action scenes, but I probably would have enjoyed it a lot more if the second half's emotional content had been just a bit more potent.
One thing I have to say: the animation is just frigging fantastic – almost as good as Pixar.
Overall, this one's pretty good. Very clever and highly entertaining, but it does fall a bit flat emotionally.
My rating: 65%.
Anyway, here are my comments on Bolt.
Well, this one defied my expectations twice in the first half-hour! It begins with an excessive action sequence, making you think the dog's a secret agent. But then it turns out it was just a movie being shot, but the dog thinks it's all real. That's a brilliant idea! But it becomes an ongoing gimmick that lasts for the first half of the movie, and it does get kind of annoying.
The movie does have a number of good jokes and impressive action scenes, but I probably would have enjoyed it a lot more if the second half's emotional content had been just a bit more potent.
One thing I have to say: the animation is just frigging fantastic – almost as good as Pixar.
Overall, this one's pretty good. Very clever and highly entertaining, but it does fall a bit flat emotionally.
My rating: 65%.
Monday 1 October 2012
First Impressions: "Home on the Range" (2004), "Chicken Little" (2005) + "Meet the Robinsons" (2007)
Well, I got through three more Disney animated features today.
First, Home on the Range. Disney's 2D animation studio was shut down for a while after this, and I wouldn't be surprised if it was exactly because of this movie! This is so unlike the Disney you'd expect that it actually goes beyond belief! It's definitely geared almost exclusively to preschool kids. It tries to throw in some jokes to keep the parents satisfied as well, but they just aren't funny. Honestly, this wouldn't be out of place alongside Barney the Dinosaur!
The only good thing I can say about it is when the villain first bursts into song, you're so taken aback that it's actually kind of funny.
Still, on the whole, it's not absolutely detestable, but this is undoubtedly the worst of all the 2D Disney features by far. Unless you're about four years old or less, I'd say this is a definite skip.
My rating: 20%.
Second, Chicken Little. The first CG-animated movie in the Disney theatrical line-up. This one just completely floored me, leaving me wondering, "What the hell did I just see?!"
First of all, none of the jokes are funny, it gets pretty grim for a kids' movie at times, and I'm honestly against the idea of animals having a human-like world like this.
But what really made my jaw drop is the direction the story ends up taking. Aliens?! Fucking aliens?! I don't know what I expected of a movie called Chicken Little, but it certainly didn't involve fucking aliens!
I don't know what else to say. Just… wow is this one bad! The twists on the original story are nice, but it all boils down to one of the most ridiculous movies I've ever seen. It's another one that screams of nothing but little kids in mind.
My rating: 20%.
And third, Meet the Robinsons. This one was really, really damn good! I was surprised. After sitting through Disney's two absolute worst earlier today, you could say this was my reward!
I'm a sucker for time travel movies, and this one has one of the best spins on the concept that I could possibly have asked for. But to reveal exactly why would mean spoiling the ending.
Let's just say the first fifteen minutes got me really excited with the promise of where the story was going, then it kind of sagged a little when it seemed like it was just throwing as much weirdness as possible at us, and then the second half accelerated to a brilliant climax.
It may seem like a weird thing for Disney to release, but it's definitely my kind of movie! You can colour me a fan of this one.
My rating: 85%.
First, Home on the Range. Disney's 2D animation studio was shut down for a while after this, and I wouldn't be surprised if it was exactly because of this movie! This is so unlike the Disney you'd expect that it actually goes beyond belief! It's definitely geared almost exclusively to preschool kids. It tries to throw in some jokes to keep the parents satisfied as well, but they just aren't funny. Honestly, this wouldn't be out of place alongside Barney the Dinosaur!
The only good thing I can say about it is when the villain first bursts into song, you're so taken aback that it's actually kind of funny.
Still, on the whole, it's not absolutely detestable, but this is undoubtedly the worst of all the 2D Disney features by far. Unless you're about four years old or less, I'd say this is a definite skip.
My rating: 20%.
Second, Chicken Little. The first CG-animated movie in the Disney theatrical line-up. This one just completely floored me, leaving me wondering, "What the hell did I just see?!"
First of all, none of the jokes are funny, it gets pretty grim for a kids' movie at times, and I'm honestly against the idea of animals having a human-like world like this.
But what really made my jaw drop is the direction the story ends up taking. Aliens?! Fucking aliens?! I don't know what I expected of a movie called Chicken Little, but it certainly didn't involve fucking aliens!
I don't know what else to say. Just… wow is this one bad! The twists on the original story are nice, but it all boils down to one of the most ridiculous movies I've ever seen. It's another one that screams of nothing but little kids in mind.
My rating: 20%.
And third, Meet the Robinsons. This one was really, really damn good! I was surprised. After sitting through Disney's two absolute worst earlier today, you could say this was my reward!
I'm a sucker for time travel movies, and this one has one of the best spins on the concept that I could possibly have asked for. But to reveal exactly why would mean spoiling the ending.
Let's just say the first fifteen minutes got me really excited with the promise of where the story was going, then it kind of sagged a little when it seemed like it was just throwing as much weirdness as possible at us, and then the second half accelerated to a brilliant climax.
It may seem like a weird thing for Disney to release, but it's definitely my kind of movie! You can colour me a fan of this one.
My rating: 85%.
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